A Bullet For The Devil: Equestrian Damnation
by kickass222urmom
Summary: Valentine "Val" Cox has been part of the Revelations Agency for most of his life as a disregarded Agent. However, when he is sent to check out a demon's portal that was manifesting in a destroyed building, his mission takes an unexpected turn. Follow as he is thrown into difficult situations as he battles demons, saves the locals, and tries to not make himself look like a idiot.
1. Prologue

Prologue

**Valentine is pronounced the same way as it is in "Valentine's Day".**

"Valentine? Answer your damn comm, Agent Valentine!" a small headset screamed in a crackling voice that echoed through the underground tunnel.

"I swear, if you've left your comm unit behind again, I'm going to have you demoted to desk jockey!" the small headset screamed again as the person on the other side began to become annoyed.

"You wouldn't take me off the field, Kurt. You know how valuable I am to the agency," Valentine responded with a smug tone in his voice as he crouched down in a small passage.

"Valentine, we have far better agents than you here at Revelations. It wouldn't hurt us to put you in a desk for awhile," responded the voice on the headset.

"If you say so, buddy," Valentine replied as he switched off his comm unit and stood up and popped his back.

He had been crouching there for the last half hour, waiting for something to happen. Strangely, nothing had happened, which was unusual for this place. Tunnels were usually crawling with the smaller demons, but it seemed to be dead today.

After standing up, he reached down and picked up his Cross Blade, which, as the name suggested, was basically a sword shaped like a cross, and placed it back on his back.

He quickly ran his hands over himself, making sure all his gear was still attached to him. Once he had finished checking himself, he was satisfied to know that his five pistols were still attached. He suddenly noticed that his ammo pouches were missing, but before he could freak out, he remembered that they were on the inside of his Revelations Uniform Long Coat, the only piece of clothing that he and all Agents of Revelations were required to wear. He, however, didn't like wearing it, which is why it was currently laying on the ground next to him.

So, after putting it back on, and saying a few swears, he walked out of the small passage and into the larger part of the sewer.

The area around him was a disaster, as the tunnel was caved in at some points and sunlight shone in from the street above.

He walked down the right side of the passage till he came to the ladder he had used to enter the sewers. As he climbed upward, he thought he heard a grunt from somewhere in the darkness below, but he didn't feel like going back down. So he continued upward till he came to the top of the manhole.

As he pulled himself out of the hole, the intense glare of the sun assaulted his face, making him squint despite his dark red tinted sunglasses. The next thing to hit him was the incredibly strong winds that had taken up an hour before.

The winds howled through the deserted buildings that stood tall all around Valentine as he stood all the way up, his white spiked back hair barely moving in the heavy winds.

Valentine looked around himself before heading off down the broken and deserted street's of what use to be New York City.

He remembers when the streets of this city use to be crawling with people, but now it's just the bones of those people.

"Valentine!" came a sudden and pissed of voice over his headset. "Did you try turning off your comm unit?! Again! You know we can turn it back on from here!"

"What is it, Kurt?" Valentine asked as he strolled along the broken pavement.

There was a small burst of static before a reply came. "Get back to Revelations, Cartman want's you to investigate something."

"Just tell me here, I don't feel like walking all the way back," Valentine said in a bored voice.

"He wants to talk face to face," Kurt said through the headset.

"Fine," Valentine said after rubbing his face. "Give me an hour."

"You have forty minutes," Kurt said before cutting the connection.

Valentine sighed and picked up his pace, letting his gaze roll over the buildings around him.

As of late, he hasn't had much to do within the Agency, since they never sent him out on the big missions. He keeps getting stuck with clean up and just general sweeping. How is he suppose to make Paladin by doing all the small jobs? He was a Knight of Revelations after all, not an Apprentice!

ooo000^000ooo  
One hour later

"You're late," Kurt said from behind his desk as Valentine walked into the main part of the Revelations Agency building.

"And you're single," Valentine remarked as he walked past Kurt. "The boss still in his office?"

"Yes, but he's probably a bit pissy on you being late," Kurt said as he began to search through a filing cabinet.

Without replying, Valentine walked past Kurt's desk and down a very small corridor that lead to the Cartman's office.

Upon stepping into the office, the first thing that caught Valentine's eyes were the rolls of pictures on the walls that lined the office. According to Cartman, they were the pictures of the first people who were expected to be demons, and the reason that the Revelations Agency was started.

The sound of someone clearing their throat caused Valentine's eyes to shift to the other end of the room where a large desk sat, and a man in the traditional clothes of an Elite Paladin stood.

"Ah, Valentine, in from the waste I see," the man said in a low voice as he walked towards Valentine with his arms behind his back.

"Yeah, but why did you call me back here? I still had four more days to spend out there," Valentine asked as the man stopped in front of him.

"For another request," the man said, a smile on his face.

Valentine raised an eyebrow. "Are you serious? You just sent me out there two days ago to clear out the sewers, and now you've called me all the way back here just to make another request?"

"Exactly," the man said with a chuckle as he began to walk back to his desk, motioning for Valentine to follow him.

"What do you need this time?" Valentine asked with a sigh as he walked behind him.

The man picked up a piece of paper that was resting on the desk and turned back to Valentine. "Nothing big, we just want you to go check out some reports of a demon portal that may have formed down in the factory district. We don't want you to go through it, we just want you to tell us if it's there or not so we can decide on what to do about it."

Valentine gave him a hard look. "Another small job? When will you give me a job worth my time?"

"Valentine," the man began with a smile. "Every job a Revelations Agent does is important. If we just ignored all the small things, then we'd all be either dead or worst in a short time."

"Fine," Valentine said after a few seconds. "But after this, can I please have at least one big job, Cartman?"

"We'll see," Cartman said with a chuckle. "But for now, restock and head out."

Valentine gave a nod and made a cross on his chest with his fingers, the salute of the Revelations Agents. He then did an about face and walked out of the office.

As he passed Kurt's desk, Kurt began to say something, but Valentine silenced him.

"Not in the mood," he said as he made his way pass Kurt and walked into the main corridor.

He walked to the left and walked till he came to the door that was simply labeled "Armory".

Upon stepping in, he was greeted by a cat that jumped on his shoulder from out of nowhere.

"What's with you and jumping on everyone's shoulders?" Valentine asked as he chuckled and walked towards the caged in area that the armory's storage was located and where the quartermaster's desk was.

"Oh, you know," the black and white cat said with a smile. "Just makes things more interesting."

"Sure," Valentine said as he reached the hole in the cage that the quartermaster would use to hand out the gear that was inside. "You're going to hurt yourself one day, Socrates."

Socrates chuckled and jumped off of Valentine's shoulder and landed inside the cage. "So, what brings you to my armory? Need more ammo, or some repairs?"

"I just need to replenish my ammo supply for all five of my pistols, and a few more holy grenades," he said as he opened his long coat to show that most of the pouches in it were empty.

"That's easy," Socrates said as he walked over to one of the crates on the floor.

Most people would think a talking cat was strange, and more people would think it was even stranger for said cat to own and operate a full armory. But considering the events of the past decade, it wasn't the strangest thing to be seen.

"Here you go, enough ammo to hold you for a two full days of fighting. I threw in six boxes incase you ran out of ammo in the clips and had time to reload them. There's also five holy grenades, and a fresh bottle of holy water, my treat," Socrates said as he pushed a box towards the opening in the cage.

Valentine smiled and bent down to pick up the box. "Thanks, Socrates. If I find some catnip out there, I'll bring it to you."

"You do that, and I'll throw all my decency to the side and purr like crazy while laying in your lap," Socrates said with a focused look on his face.

Valentine just laughed at him and opened the box to reveal rows of clips for his pistols. He quickly placed each one in a holder inside his long coat and put the spares and the other items in the pouches on his belt. Once he was done, he put the box back in the cage for Socrates.

Socrates nodded and offered a smile. "Good luck on whatever mission you're going on."

"Thanks," Valentine said as he stood up and adjusted his gear. "I should be back in a day or so."

After saying goodbye, Valentine walked out of the armory and began to head for the main lobby, which lead to the courtyard, which finally lead to the front gate.

He had a three hour walk ahead of him before he would reach the factory district.


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

The factory district, a demon breeding ground for all low and mid level demons, and the occasional high level demon.

This place is one of the lesser infested zones, but it's still a very active area for demons and kings.

However, Valentine had only killed a handful of lesser demons on his way into the factory district. Usually, he would have killed at least fifty or so before even reaching the middle of the district.

Now that he thinks about it, there hasn't been much demon activity in the city lately. Normally, this would be a good thing. But to a Revelations Agent, it cast an eerie shadow.

Valentine walked into the center of the factory district, an open area with warehouses and factories surrounding it. He held a 9mm in each hand, looking around for any sign of a demon or a demon portal. However, as far as he could tell, he was alone with nothing but the strong winds and the setting sun.

"Damn it," he cursed as he turned in every direction. He hated getting jobs like this, they were usually very boring and would take all day or night to complete.

Off to the side, near an old warehouse, he heard the sound of metal hitting metal. He twirled to face the direction of the sound, and saw something standing in the fading light.

He squinted his eyes and could barely make out a humanoid form that looked to have wings and a tail. But before he could make out more of it, the form flapped its wings and shot towards him.

Seconds before the humanoid form hit him, he combat rolled to the side, unleashing a volley of blessed bullet into the form as it flew past him.

However, the bullets seemed to do nothing to the form other than push it to the side a bit.

The humanoid form came to a sudden stop and landed a few yards away from Valentine.

Valentine brought his two pistols to bear on the form and started to pull the trigger.

"You Revelations Agents, always resorting to your toys," said the form in a bored, yet cocky voice.

Upon hearing the voice, Valentine began to sweat a bit, and began to pull the triggers on his weapons.

The form easily dodged each of his bullets and shot forward, slamming into him and sending him skidding across the ground.

As he slide backwards, Valentine brought up both pistols and empty the rest of the clips into the humanoid. The moment he fired his last bullet, he slammed into the side of a warehouse, breaking through the cheap and weak metal.

When he came to a stop, he quickly stood up, pressed the clip release buttons on the two 9mm's, and let each clip fall into a pouch on his side that held all empty clips. He then stuck his hands holding the pistols into his long coat and slammed them into two fresh clips that were attached to the inside of the coat.

Once he was reloaded, he put away the two small caliber pistols and began to reach for the heavy magnum that was strapped to his leg, but decided it was too much for the occasion, and instead pulled out the two Desert Eagle's that were attached to his belt.

The moment he pulled out the two hand cannons, the humanoid form burst into the warehouse, landing six yards away from Valentine.

"Seriously?" the demonic form asked as it strolled forward.

Without answering, Valentine began to pull the triggers on the two magnums, causing them to explode in an angry fury, sending bullets slamming into the form.

The humanoid jerked with each bullet and flew upward to escape the onslaught of blessed bullets.

Valentine trailed the demonic form with his magnums, hitting it each time and only missing a few times.

However, the moment both of his pistols clicked empty, the form twirled in the air and shot down towards him.

At the last second, Valentine dived to the side, letting the form slam into the ground where he once stood.

In under five seconds, Valentine released the clips into the drop pouch and reloaded the two pistols in the same fashion as the 9mm's.

Instead of firing at the form with both pistols, he put them back in their holsters and pulled the Cross Blade off of his back, holding it in both hands.

The humanoid form stood up and looked at Valentine. After a few seconds, it spread its wings and began to flap them, starting to hover above the ground.

Valentine, although a bit frightened, forced a smirk. "What is it, Alva? Can't handle me? A simple Agent?"

Alva, the domonic form, chuckled, "I have places to be, things to do. I don't feel like healing from small wounds inflicted by a human."

"Who said you'd recover?" Valentine said in a smug tone of voice.

Without replying, Alva flapped his wings and flew backwards through the hole that he had previously made upon entering the warehouse.

"Wait, get back here!" Valentine yelled, running through the hole he had made and ran after Alva, who was flying towards a larger warehouse.

Valentine quickly put the Cross Blade on his back and pulled out his two 9mm's, all the while still sprinting towards the warehouse that Alva had just flew into.

The moment Valentine stepped into the warehouse, he could feel something was off. There was a slight heavy pressure in the air, which could have either meant there was a demon portal in the area, or there was a high level king demon in the area.

Luckily for Valentine, he saw what he was sent there to look for.

In the middle of the room was a large, purple ball of light. On the floor around the ball of light was a large circle with a six sided star in it.

"That was a little easier than expected," Valentine commented as he looked at the demon portal. He began to reach up to his headset, but a thought hit him.

The Agency never gave him any high level missions, and since they did send him on this one, the least he could do was go through the portal, that way he could give a better detailed description of it.

So, ignoring what Cartman told him, he walked forward, heading for the large purple ball of demonic energy.

Then, doing something only a group of Paladin's of Revelations were allowed to do, he stepped into the portal.

ooo000^000ooo

The moment he stepped out of the portal, Valentine found himself on a dirt road facing a forest.

Valentine looked at the forest and shook his head. The portal was just a normal portal, leading from one place to another.

He began to walk back through the portal, but the sound of an explosion followed by screaming caught his attention. He turned to the left and was greeted by an unexpected sight.

A large, colorful city with a castle, as in a literal castle, behind it.

Valentine raised an eyebrow, wondering if he was in England or someplace like that, but the sounds of more screaming, and the trails of smoke coming from the city, broke his train of thought.

He looked back at the portal and then back at the city. Protocol stated that an Agent was always suppose to report back to Revelations before taking on a large task.

So, not wanting to get demoted, or worst, he put his hand to his headset and turned it on.

"Kurt, I've found a city that seems to be full of people. What do you want me to do?"

He waited for a reply, but all he could hear was the sound of static.

"Well damn," he cursed as he turned off the headset. Apparently, he was somehow out of range of the Revelations Agency. That's never happened before, seeing as the range on the comm units have a fairly large radius of communication.

He considered going back through the demon portal and contacting Kurt there, but the continuous screams of people and the increasing smoke trails was getting to him.

After a second, he began to sprint forwards towards the city. Deciding to contact Kurt later.

The distance from the portal to the city wasn't that much, but it still took Valentine three full minutes to reach it.

The moment he reached the outskirts of the city, he saw three low level demons, Pups, run out of a building on all fours, each one of them covered in blood.

Valentine, on instinct, raised his pistol's and dropped each of the Pups with just two shots each.

He strolled past the building and saw a few dead animals on the ground. Horses and a few dogs. But no people.

To the right, a door burst open and a horse ran out. Valentine whipped his hands to the side and was about to shot the horse, as it could be a possesed animal, but the sounds of it screaming, followed by a mid level demon, a Stalker, running after it, forced Valentine to raise an eyebrow.

He shifted his weapons on the Stalker and pulled the trigger three times, forcing the Stalker to retreat down an alley way.

The horse it had been chasing continued to run, screaming the entire time.

"This is strange," Valentine commented as he shot another Pup that was running towards him.

As he strolled deeper into the city, he saw more horses that were running around and screaming.

If he had seen this twelve years ago when everything was normal, he would have been freaking out at this point. But, after fighting demons for an entire decade, he was use to seeing strange and unexplainable things.

He put away his two 9mm's, after emptying and reloading them, and pulled out the Cross Blade, deciding to save ammo.

The first demon foolish enough to attack him was a mid level demon, a Striller.

It swung it's multiple bladed arm at Valentine, giving him barely enough time to raise his blade and block the attack. Valentine blocked a few more attacks before swing his sword, cutting through the blades of the demon and slicing its body in half.

As soon as he killed the Striller, the Stalker he had wounded pounced on him, trying to get to his neck.

Valentine struggled against the Stalker with one hand as he tried to pull it off his back. Finally, he was able to grab ahold of its head and throw it to the ground, followed by his blade as he impaled the small demon in the gut, or what would have been its gut.

He looked around and noticed that he wasn't the only one fighting. Because in front of him was a group of armor clad horses trying to fight off two Pups. Sadly, their weapons were not crafted to fight demons and their swords and spears broke against the skin of the demons.

A demon can not be hurt with traditional methods, as in earthly methods. In order to actually hurt or kill a demon, the weapon being used must be blessed, made of holy material, or for the person to be a priest.

And since the horses weapons were just using plain swords and spears, they had no chance against the demons that were attacking them.

Valentine, sighing a bit, sprung forward and performed two quick slashes, easily killing the two pups.

The moment he killed them, one of the horses thrusted its spear at him. Valentine parried the spear and gave the horse a sharp glare.

"I'm trying to help you, dumbass!" he yelled as he twirled around in time to slash a Striller that had advanced on him.

"Help?" one of the horses asked in confusion.

"Yes, help!" Valentine snapped as he blocked the attack of a second Striller.

"... Why?" another asked.

Valentine cut through the Striller's bladed arm and torso. "Are you seriously questioning my help?!" he yelled. "Do you want me to just leave you all to yourselves?"

"No!" they all yelled in almost complete unison.

"Then don't attack or question me!" Valentine said as he nodded to each of them.

They all nodded back in response.

Before anything more could be said, the sounds of multiple yells of pain erupted behind Valentine. He spun around just in time to see a group of armored horses get blown back by an unseen foe.

Valentine raised his Cross Blade, expecting a mid level demon to emerge from behind the building.

However, instead of one of the more common demons, a high level demon, a Genero, walked out. Each of its arms alight with black demonic power, and black smoke rising from parts of its body.

"Just my fucking luck," Valentine said as he lifted his blade and walked towards the Genero.

The Genero, not paying him much attention, shot out one its arms at a building, destroying it in a fury of black flames.

Valentine, upon reached the Genero, quickly swung his sword upward, cutting off one of the Genero's arms. He then twisted the blade a bit and cut off one of its legs with ease. Lastly, he pulled out one of his 9mm's and fired an entire clip into the back and head of the Genero.

After reloading and putting away his pistol, Valentine turned and began to walk away.

Behind him, as he expected, he heard the sickening sounds of the demon regenerating.

He waited a few seconds before turning around to face the Genero, now standing up and completely unhurt.

"I guess we're doing this the old fashion way," Valentine said as he pulled out a holy grenade and put it in his mouth, biting down on the small handle on the grenade, and pulled out one of his Desert Eagle's.

He charged forward, his Cross Blade in one hand, the Desert Eagle in the other, and the holy grenade clenched between his teeth.

The Genero's arm shot out, turning into a blade in mid air. Valentine, dodged to the right and brought up his magnum, firing two shots into the face of the Genero. He then used his blade to easily slice off most of the Genero's arm before it could retract it.

With a roar of anger, the Genero slashed out with its other arm, barely missing Valentine.

Valentine, as the arm shot towards him, dived between the legs of the Genero, slicing its legs as he passed between them.

The demon let out a roar of rage as it fell to its knees.

Valentine rolled to his feet, firing four blessed bullets into the back of the Genero. He then quickly put away the pistol and ran forward, jumping onto the demons back.

The Genero stood back up as its wounds healed and began to try and rip Valentine off of its back.

With practiced ease, Valentine raised his Cross Blade and sliced off the head of the demon. He then quickly pulled the holy grenade out of his mouth and held down the two buttons on either side of it. With a flashing blue light, the grenade was active. He raised his hand into the air and slammed it down into the demons body.

He then leaned back and jumped off of the Genero's body. He landed on his feet and stood up, watching as the Genero's head regenerated.

As he watched, he heard the sound of a Pup charging him. Without looking, his hand wielding the Cross Blade shot out, cutting through the Pup's face and most of its body.

The Genero turned towards him and roared in complete rage before charging towards him.

Valentine smirked.

Seconds before the Genero reached him, there was a flash from inside its body, followed by a blinding light to flash for two seconds.

As the light faded, Valentine was pleased to see that all that remained of the demon was a small pile of smoking ash's.

Valentine put away his sword and drew his 9mm's.

Suddenly, a powerful, female voice erupted out of nowhere.

"My little ponies! Run to the palace! There is a magical shield around it that will protect you! Please hurry!"

The voice sounded desperate, but also firm. Like someone who was worried about a loved one, but was doing their best to stay strong for that person.

Valentine looked around till he saw the castle, which was indeed surrounded by a golden shield. He didn't know if it would actually hold demons at bay, but he did want to talk to the person, or whatever, in charge of the castle.

So, Valentine made his way to the shielded castle, killing and saving horses along the way.

Upon reaching the outer part of the shield, he stopped and looked at it. It looked solid, but he still didn't know if it could hold back demons.

A roar behind him caused him to turn his head. Behind him was another Genero, this one looking a bit pissy, seeing as its partner had been killed.

Not feeling like fighting another Genero, and wanting to test the shield, Valentine stepped through the golden shield and watched as the Genero charged towards him.

Valentine stood his ground, but as it neared him, he began to sweat a bit.

When it was close to the shield, it picked up its speed, slamming into the shield. It's entire upper body exploded in a shower of gore at the impact.

Valentine chuckled a bit as the Genero slowly regenerated and stood back up. It began to pound on the shield in ripe anger.

All around the shield, he could see all kinds of demons slamming into it, trying to break through.

After a few seconds, Valentine turned around casually strolled towards the gate of the castle.

ooo000^000ooo

All the horses in the castle seemed fine with Valentine, seeing as none of them had tried to kill him again.

He looked around the courtyard as he walked towards the main part of the castle. It was full of the injured and dying horses that had made it to the castle.

As he walked, a strange demonic looking horse ran towards him wearing dark colored armor. He started to pull out a pistol, but stopped as the horse started talking.

"Are you the one who was killing those things earlier?"

Valentine nodded and simply replied, "Yes."

"Then come with me," the demonic horse said as it turned and began to walk for the main part of the castle.

Having nothing else to do, Valentine followed him.

After entering the main part of the castle, the demonic horse led him down a couple hallways, and a few rooms, before they arrived in a very large room with a couple of strange looking horses at the end of it.

"I have brought the strange thing that you requested," the demonic horse said to the three strange horses.

"You may leave us now," the largest one said.

"Thank you, Princess," the demonic horse said as it backed out of the room.

"So, I take it as you're the one in charge?" Valentine asked as he eyed them down.

"Actually, it's all three of us," the dark colored one said.

"Well, I'm actually new, but I'm still in charge," said the purple one.

"Tell us," said the tall white one. "Who are you? And how do you kill those things so easily? As far as I can tell, our weapons do nothing to them, and neither does our magic."

"Well," Valentine began. "I'm Valentine Cox, but please just call me Val. And unless your weapons, or magic, are blessed or holy, you're not going to even hurt a demon."

"Explain, please," the tall one said as it cocked its head.

Valentine then explained how to kill a demon, and how to make weapons to do so.

"So, if we had our weapons blessed, we could fight them, correct?" the dark colored one asked.

Valentine nodded.

"So if you were to bless our weapons and magic, we could fight them?"

Valentine shook his head no. "No, I'm not able to actually bless weapons and stuff like that. I'm not a priest, or at least, not yet. That's the rank above mine. I have to have others do the blessing for me."

They looked a bit disappointed at this, but they didn't falter.

"So," the purple one started. "Can you help us?"

"I can," Valentine confirmed.

"Then," the tall one began to say. "I need you to go somewhere for me."

"And where is that?"

"I need you to go to the town of Ponyville and protect it. Those things are going to reach it very soon and I want to make sure they're safe."

"What about here?" Valentine asked.

"Don't worry, I'm holding the shield up at the moment. It's going to take a lot to bring it down, especially with all three of us here," the tall one said.

"Alright," Valentine said with a nod. "So, how do I get to this town?"

"We'll teleport you there," the purple one answered. "Normally, it would be impossible for just one pony to teleport something from here to Ponyville, but with three Alicorn's, it's a piece of cake."

"... Makes sense," Valentine said with a chuckle.

"You ready? Once we know it's safe there, we'll bring you back here," the tall one said.

"Yeah, I'm about as ready as I can be."

"Now steel yourself," the dark one said as it tilted its head at him, followed by the other two.

There was a small flash, followed by Valentine's skin tingling. A second later, he was standing on a grassy hill.

"... I wish the Agency had that," he commented as he turned around to see the town.

The sight that greeted him caused him to raise an eyebrow. "Now, that's something I didn't expect to see."


End file.
